I needed to smile

I just got off of an very expected phone call, and I loved every minute. So last Monday I called my dad adn we talked for a minute on the phone and I asked him to foward my phone number to my mother. Let me back up a minute, I haven't spoken to my father, or mother is a little over two years. Yes, I know that sounds ridiculous, but it's true....I am an Asshole.

So, my mom calls me and I was just floored. I needed to reconnect with my family. It's something that I needed to do. We were never really a tight family as I was growing up. We didn't do family dinner, or go on vacation, or have game night. We definatly weren't the Huxables. I couldn't wait to move away. I never really knew who I was and I needed to get away to "find myself". Every aspect of my life, and personality is a product of the last five years. I have grown more since 99, than the previous 18 years of my life. I can actually say I am a man, and I'm an adult. It still sounds weird but for the first time in my life, I feel like me. I can't wait until they get to see the "new" me.

The best part about the phone call was that I know my mom wanted to talk about my sexuality. It wasn't somthing that I was comfortable with while home, but I'm completly out, and comfortable in my new skin. Anyway, she kept tiptoeing around the subject but we never really talked about it. I could tell she was struggling and it was awkward for her. It is wrong that I got a weird sense of enjoyment out of that. I know I'm cinical but it was fun.

The phone call has just made the entire week much better. It make me smile...I needed to smile.